Losing
by Sagoteller
Summary: Natalie, a bullied little girl, but still so kind. When Jack sees her, he wants to make her happy. Because that is what he do. He makes children happy. But maybe, this time he'll fail.
1. First

She sat on the little balcony that was a part of her flat and stared out over the city. It was so... Busy. And somehow oddly beautiful. To her woods, rivers and lakes were beautiful. Not cities. But it was just something about this particular place that made her love it with all her heart. It was... different, but still not. It was hard to explain. Her family just had moved here. They used to live a bit outside it, near the forest. Her mother decided that it would be more practical for them to live in town. Closer to school, closer to jobs. Closer to everything.

But she missed the forest. Especially now on the autumn. One of the most beautiful things she knew was to see the trees change.

She put down the now empty tea cup on the little table she had there and stood up, leaning at the little fence instead. What if she jumped, crashed down to the road. Maybe she would die by the fall, or from getting hit by a car. Or, maybe she would land _on _a car, or the car would steer away and she would survive somehow. Or maybe the wind could carry her away. If it was strong enough maybe that would be possible.

She sighed, grabbed her cup and went into the flat again. She did not shut the balcony door after her though. She went into the kitchen and put the cup in the sink. It was yellow by the way. The cup, not the sink. And it was old too. Once again, the cup not the sink.

After that, she just wandered around in the flat. Put on some music. The music was a mix of basically everything. Something that made her feel, and something that made her glad.

The music made her want to dance, but her legs would probably give up. She missed dancing quite a bit. Especially the dance classes.

She used to dance ballet. She was not that good, but she loved it. As much as she used to love drawing, writing... The only thing she now really enjoyed, was to sit on the balcony, drink tea, read and stare.

She had been like that sense the summer, why she wasn't certain. But she didn't care, nor did her parents or her old friends. She was the same as before, just more calm and... _Tired. _But she still had times when she was that embarrassingly hyper. She would like to ignore those periods though.

She threw a look at the clock. Quarter past four. Her father would be home from work any time soon.

She walked into her room and threw herself onto the bed. All she wanted was to crawl under the sheets and sleep away the week. No school, no tests, no people to deal with... That would be nice.

Knowing that that wasn't possibly she sat up with a big sigh. She looked across her room. The white walls that once were covered with posters were as boring as usual, so was the pale floor boards. A bed, a drawer, a desk. The only thing that brought colour to the room was the big collection of books. One of the walls was completely covered in various bookshelves. She stood up and walked over to it. She stroke her hand over the back of _The Hound Of Baskervilles _before pulling it out. She got that one from her grandma before she passed away a couple of years ago. The words _Congratulations on your 12__h__ birthday Natalie!/ Grandma _were written on the first page. She took the book and returned to her bed. Then she started to read. Soon she was lost in the lives of Sherlock Holmes, Doctor holmes and Sir Charles, Hugo and Henry Baskerville. Kind of.

" Hi Natalie!" her father shouted as he entered the flat. Natalie cringed a bit at the load sound.

" Hello!" she shouted back, more silent than her father. She could hear how he started with the dinner. Then her focus was once again on the book. It was the seventh time she read it. The same goes for the rest of the books. She had read them all multiple times. Except from the bad ones of course. But either way, she really needed to visit the library. Tomorrow, after school she decided. It would be nice to talk to the librarian again.

At dinner her mother was the only one that talked, as usual. And of course she was annoyed with that.

"Have you two lost your voices?" she snapped.

"No." dad answered. Natalie just shook her head.

"Well why aren't you speaking then?" the mother continued, sounding proper annoyed.

Natalie knew that this was the moment when the best she could do was to stop listening. The little annoyance soon developed into a full blown fight. That her mother mostly stood for. She shouted, while dad just sat there defenseless.

"It's all your fault! You can't even handle a work, raise a child..." her mother ranted. Okay, that last one hurt.

"Lena, calm down okay." her dad finally said. Instead of listening to the rest of the fight, Natalie fled back into her room. She pulled out one of the drawers and pulled out a pack of earplugs. They almost shut out the sound of her parents. Hopefully the neighbors wouldn't complain. Again.

She picked up her book and once again got lost in the fictional world.

He studied her through the window. She looked so... Sad. She also looked too old for believing. But not old enough to be counted as an grown up. Which made her a child, which made her his responsibility. She needed him, he could feel that. It was the same feeling he got with Jamie. Well almost... It was close enough.

He touched the window with his staff and a delicate pattern of frost appeared glass. One last look at the girl, then he swept off.


	2. Second

When Natalie woke up it was still dark outside. And the temperature seemed to have dropped in her room. She shivered and pulled her knees to her chest. She looked at the clock- 5 am. The alarm usually went of at 7 am. 2 hours. In 2 hours. _No idea to fall asleep again,_ she thought. She could go to the library before school instead. With that in mind she forced herself to get up. Fast, she pulled on some jeans and a hoodie. She noticed that the window had gained some frost during the night. The winter was coming early this year.

She sneaked out in the kitchen and made herself some breakfast. Yogurt and cereal. She wondered if her parents still were home. Her mother usually went to work really early- Like 4 am early. Her father could go any time between 5 am and 9 am. He could do as he pleased.

She put the empty bowl in the sink (Her yellow cup was still there) before returning to her room. She looked through her schoolbag to make sure that everything was there. Yes.

She went out to the hallway and put her shoes on and grabbed her jacket. She threw a quick look at the mirror. Her curly brown her was a mess as usual (She didn't even bother with brushing it anymore) and her blue eyes looked tired.

When she got out the wind blew her hair in front of her face. She groaned and searched her bag for something to tie it up with. She would love to cut it really short, but her mother wouldn't agree on that.

She couldn't find anything to tie her hair with... Great.

It was really cold too.

It was a fifteen minutes walk to her school. The library was just across the street.

She almost felt like home when she stepped inside the library's doors. The smell of books was filling the air, and a smile placed itself on her lips. The smell of books was comforting to her.

"Natalie! It has been awhile!" the librarian (whom at the time was busy with a costumer) said and smiled at her . The librarian was an old women, in her middle sixties or something. Natalie actually didn't know her name.

"Hi!" she smiled back before walking in between the shelves. She stroke with her hand over the books. Just by touching them, she could almost _feel_ the story they would tell her. Her hand stopped on a thinner book. It looked old, but still untouched. She pulled it out and read the title. _Legends and myths, volume 2. _She flipped it over to read the back text. It was nothing there though. She opened it and looked through the register. It was some kind of dictionary over a bunch of mythical people. Everything from Greek gods to Santa Claus. Her eyes stopped at the pretty familiar name Jack Frost. She quickly flipped to page 74.

_Jack Frost._

_Jack Frost_ _is known as the "winter spirit". According to the lore he is supposed to be guilty of blizzards and the heavy snowfall. He has the power of controlling the snow and the wind. It is said that he is a happy and loving person... _She already knew that. She putted the book back on it's shelf and kept walking through the library.

Jack Frost was her absolute favourite mythical character, even though there wasn't too much about him. She liked the winter almost as much as she loved the autumn, so of course she liked the person who brought it. But he wasn't real.

But what if he was...

If she ever met him they maybe could have a snowball fight. When she was little she didn't have any friends to play with and her parents wasn't up for it. If she would play in school she would just end up getting injured. Something about hitting her with hard packed snow amused the other children.

He maybe even could be her friend. Maybe he could be there, and tell her calming words when her parents fought. That would be nice.

Her fantasy kept on with imagining her and Jacks life as she looked for books.

She ended up borrowing three. Two fantasy books and one about a mystery. After a short chat with the librarian she went to school.

The snow had started to fall.

She walked through the corridors with her head bent down. No one said hello. No one acknowledged her at all. Not even the teachers.

Sometimes, she was pretty certain on that she didn't exist. Or that it was all in her head. It probably was, with her imagination. Maybe she actually lived on the country, far, far away from people who wanted her bad. At least she hoped for that.

Or maybe it was reality. It was probably real. It felt real.

She got to her locker and changed her bag to some school books.

When she was on her way back home she passed some people from her school. Some of them where in her year, some a bit younger. To her surprise one of them actually walked up to her. She wasn't sure if she was happy or just suspicious about it.

"Hi." the boy said. Natalie just nodded at him. "Erhm... Can you come with me? I want to ask you something and I don't want anyone to hear." he said quickly with a small smile on his face.

"Sure." she said quietly.

The boy led her to the bridge that leaped over the road. A couple of cars drove by before the boy said anything.

"I was wondering if you would like to..."

"FREAK!" another voice screamed. Before she could react, one of the other boys pushed her. She flew over the fence over the bridge.

Before she fell she saw the first boys face. _Did we really trick you that easy?_

It didn't hurt to land though. It felt like the wind caught her and brought her down safely. _Jack Frost, _was the words that plopped into her head to explain that.

She could her the boys laughing as the moved away. She didn't blame them though. It was probably her fault anyway.

Natalie was laying just next to the road. No car would hit her with other words. She didn't have the strength to move. She was to tired. She just wanted to lay there for awhile. Maybe even sleep for a bit. Now she knew how the girl with the matches felt.

But the wind wouldn't have it. It was as if it tried to get her up. It lifted her up, made her fly for awhile, before letting her go again. Then it disappeared. Just for a moment though, as if it was building if its strength. This time it made her stand up.

The cold had paralyzed her mind completely, so she barely reacted on it. Then, the wind slowly guided her home.

That night, her parents got into another fight. This time, it clearly was about her. The only thing she wanted right now was a friend.

Out of pure desperation she opened her window and screamed:  
"Jack Frost I need you!"

"Finally."


	3. Third

A white headed boy jumped into her room. He was wearing a blue hoodie and brown trousers. In his hand he held some kind of wooden staff. A big smile was planted on his face.

"Who are you?" Natalie quietly said and tilted her head to the side. Jack was a bit surprised that she didn't know who he was.

But if he got shoved of a bridge, he would be quite suspicious too if a stranger jumped into his room.

"I'm Jack Frost." he said. The frown on Natalie's face was exchanged with a surprised look.

"As in _the _Jack Frost?" she said. Maybe it was another prank... Maybe "Jack Frost" was supposed to shove her out the window. She took some step to the left so that her back was against the bookshelves instead of the window. Jack's wide smile shrank just a bit.

"I'm not going to hurt you. Promise." he said. About a minute passed before Natalie relaxed.

"Okay."

"Great!" Jack said happily.

_"... And your behaviour! Can't you see that she is copying that..." _Natalie's mother screamed. Jack's smile disappeared completely and turned into a frown at those words.

"Do you wanna go away for awhile? Until they stop screaming." Jack said, sounding a bit worried. Natalie nodded.

"How and where?"

"We'll fly! Where, we can decide on the way!" Jack said. _Fly? _Jack noticed her wondering look.

"With the wind. I can carry you on my back. I promise I wont drop you." he said. "Here, jump up." he continued and turned her back against her. Natalie hesitated before jumping on his back.

"Promise you wont drop me." she said, her voice trembling just a bit.

"Promise."

Then Jack threw himself out of the window.

The wind caught them and they flew straight up. Natalie closed her eyes at first, not daring to look.

"Open your eyes!" Jack said to her, as if he could feel her closed eyes. She slowly opened them and then slightly gasped. First, because of the height. They must be at least 70 meters up. Then, because of the beauty. At first, she only saw the city. The city lights looked like little stars. Then, she saw the forest.

"Jack, look! It's the forest!" she shouted.

"Yes, Natalie, it's a forest." Jack laughed.

"No, _the _forest! Can we go there?"

"Sure."

Just as Natalie was starting to get too cold they were there. She jumped of Jack's back stumbled a bit through the snow, before running into the forest.

"Hey, wait for me!" Jack shouted before setting of after her. He caught up with her quite fast. She wasn't the best runner. Physical activity was never really her thing...

They kept on running. Jack noticed how Natalie' lips had turned blue. He grabbed her arm, forcing her to stop. She was really cold.

"We should go back." he said. She shook her head.

" There's a thing I need to see first." she replied.

"Let me at least carry you, so you wont have to run bare feet in the snow." Jack answered, glancing down at her feet.

"Okay then." she said, and jumped onto his back for the second time. "I'll tell you where to go."

Natalie led them deeper and deeper into the forest.

"Nearly there yet?" Jack whined. He was starting to get bored.

"Okay, stop." Natalie commanded and jumped of his back before leaving the trail.

She had found this place once when she was little. Just by pure accident. She had seen a rabbit on the trail. As soon as the rabbit saw her, it ran into the forest. She followed and found a lake with a little island.

It was still there.

The lake was frozen. Hopefully enough to carry her over to the island.

She used to come her every now and then as a child. The water and the trees...comforted her. Kind of. It felt better when she was alone.

She tapped the ice with her foot, before she slowly layed all her weight on that leg. The ice didn't crack. That much.

She was half way to the island when Jack finally got through the forest.

"Natalie, be careful!" he shouted, his voice filled with worry.

She reached the island without any problem. Memories...

This was what she called home. The forest. Every time her parents fought, every time she was to sad, every time she just needed a quiet place, she knew that the forest could provide that. It gave her an entirely different universe to live in, a place where she set the rules. A place where she knew that she was safe. A place where her imagination could...come true. All of the characters were some what real here. All of the adventures came true.

But that was gone now.

"Natalie, are you completely crazy?!" Jack shouted behind her. She turned around and faced him. His anger over her stupidity went away when he saw her expression. It was so... Sad. Not the childish sadness over a broken toy, but an adults sadness over loss.

"Are you... Are you okay?" Natalie's sad smile grew as she nodded.

"Of course I am." she stated and turned around so that Jack wouldn't see the tears in her eyes.

_Stop being so pathetic Natalie, _she thought to herself. Crying over a forest...

"Hey," Jack said as he flew over to her. "It's okay to be sad you know." He tried to look her in the eye, but she immediately turned her face away.

"I just... I... Sorry." she mumbled. _Stop being such a baby._

"Nothing to be sorry for." Jack answered as he awkwardly patted her shoulder.

Then Natalie's defense broke. She threw herself into Jack's arms, and started sobbing recklessly.

"I'm sorry." she said through her tears.

"It's okay." Jack repeated.

After that, he carried her home again. He didn't know anything about her at all, but the protective instincts was just...strong. She reminded her of his little sister. She reminded him about Jamie. And as he wanted to protect them, he wanted to protect her.

Some where along the journey back home Natalie had fallen asleep. Jack was careful with not waking her up. He flew into her room with ease. To his relief her parents had stopped shouting.

He putted her on the bed and flew away to the window.

"Don't leave." he heard Natalie whisper. Sleep talking.

"I have to." he answered, even tough she couldn't hear him.

Then, he flew away.

Natalie didn't exactly have a nice sleep though.

Horrifying nightmares haunted her dreams.


	4. Last

It was simple nightmares.

So simple, that they could have been reality. No monsters. Just other people.

But maybe they were the monsters.

She woke up.

Sweat was dripping of her face.

Later, Jack came. And he kept coming, every single day. When the snow started to melt, and the spring bloomed. The visits got a little bit more rare over the summer. He said that he really couldn't stand the heat.

And then they became regular again as the leafs turned red.

And Natalie got worse.

She didn't even realize that she was bad before. But as she turned 14, something... Snapped. Either out of place, or back. She wasn't just sad, she was miserable. And Jack couldn't do a thing. And as she got older, she grew more unhappy. The kids got meaner and they learned more tricks. More ways to hurt.

And Jack tried. He tried, and tried, and tried. Until Natalie didn't believe anymore. Then, he could just watch as the girl faded.

Natalie wished that they would just punch her in the face instead. That would be better, then all the words.

Tick, tock, and another year had passed.

She believed that Jack was something her mind had made up, to keep her at least a bit sane. Now, she was not even a person anymore. She was a shell, a shell with scars that she had made on her own.

And another year passed.

She search so much for a someone to save her. She searched, but without luck. Someone seemed to think that she already had used all of hers. She had nothing left.

Nothing.

So she didn't see the point. And without a point, what did she had? Without a purpose she was fine, but when the point vanished it was over.

Over.

So she decided a date. 1st of May.

And Jack could only watch. Watch and learn, that all stories don't have a happy ending.

Some just end badly.


End file.
